I am just fucking love my life.
I fucking love it
I fucking love it
I fucking love it
I fucking love it

FUCK IT LA.


Seriously I must say this, even I am having this risk my brother might see this blog.
Whatever la,
is my blog, I have the rights to say anything I want.
FUCK IT LA.
I know you always say you do not know how fortunate I am.
Fuck it. I can’t take it anymore

Talk in terms of financial and money
FUCK IT!

I seriously have been living on my own since the first day of college started.
Sept 2008, I have been paying all expenses on my own.
I have been paying from Sept 2008 until April 2009.
7months. You wonder how come I have so much money?
Simply because I work like a mad dog and those are my saving.
I fucking used to don’t like the fact that my mom is not paying me for my daily expenses.
I am not even working for now, how can I even pay for myself? For everything?
Earlier on I have been complaining a lot and my relationship with her is getting from worse to worst.
Those who are close to me will know how ridiculous my mother can be.

But now I choose not to mention and think about this problem anymore because
i) My mom not working. Ok fine. Should not ask her
ii) Don’t want to ask her, if not she will nag you 24/7, for days, weeks, years and forever.

Ever since I was 16, I pay for everything, from clothes, under garment, education, argh basically everything. Imagine last time I can only wear one bra for very long? One shirt all the time? One shoe for few years? Ok maybe my family is not rich, we are poor people. But if we were so poor, why is my mom so addicted to TOTO? She buy for 3 places (per day) with super long train list. She can pay for that but not paying for me. She can sometimes buy clothes for my brother but not me.

When I do not ask her for money I also would appreciate if she wont kay poh on my spending.
She DIDN’T PAID FOR EVERYTHING then why must she kay poh when I spend when I go out with my friends? My brothers are the same. They say you have money to go out with friends but no money to pay us back? LOOK, I am not spending YOUR money. Is my money, I am no longer complain so why are you complaining much?

Some of you all know I have applied for government study loan for RM48000 right?
Guess what, I am not allowed to use the extra money from the loan,
My brother is the one taking care of all these money _l_
Good la, no income no money. GOOD ah. I ask for more money tio fk upside down by my mom.

Last month my expenses per week should be rm40. OBV MY MONEY GONE SO FAST RIGHT.
I USE MY OWN MONEY N ASK FOR EXTRA MONEY FROM THE LOAN TIO SCOLD LIKE SHYT. FK IT LA.

Talk in terms of FREEDOM
FUCK IT!

I am legally an adult but I still fucking get restricted. My curfew is 7pm? Or I should say, once the sky turn dark, then phone calls by them will be ringing non stop. I fucking hate it when I go out with people I am always in concern that I MUST be home early, I am always the party crasher, the mood crasher.

I go out with my friends ONCE A WEEK, only SUNDAY. Is that fucking too much?
You all have been complaining I have been GOING OUT EVERYDAY.
HELLO WHAT EVERYDAY. I believe there is something call dictionary.
I only go out ON SUNDAY. Monday to Saturday I am AT HOME.
You all keep nagging nagging nagging nagging nagging.
FUCK IT LA. You expect me to stay at home forever? zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Talk in terms of INTERNET
FUCK IT!

I know I have abuse the usage and use very long.
You all don’t let me go out that much what can I do?
Online la. I go out I wont online what. -.-
You want me to pay half for the internet I say I no money right?
In the end you buay song. Ok I think I will take my own broadband next month.
I wont tell you first, now I REN you.
And still, I know is my fault for using the net for long.
But I cant watch tv. The only thing is tv & internet =l
Haihs always tio banned from using the net. I am used to it.

I want to work during the 3months holiday to earn some extra money.
But my friends want to take short sem for LAN subjects during the holidays -.-
So I guess I am going to do all my LAN subjs for year 2 degree alone bah .
Cant do anything much =l

Talk in terms of COLLEGE
FUCK IT!

The person who in charge of PTPTN LOAN is just fking slow.
After a LONGGGGGGGG while the government finally PAID.
BUT THE FREAKING PPL FROM COLLEGE NVR EVEN BOTHERED TO REFUND US THE OVER PAYMENT MONEY ZZZZZZZZZZZ !!!!!!!!!!!!!

Screw the college for having classes 2 days per week =.=
Screw the college for having such nice facilities =.=
Screw the college for having authority people =.= when you need them, you cant find them
Screw the college for everything !! =.=

Talk in terms of FRIENDSHIP
FUCK IT!

Sometimes when I need someone to talk with,
When I see my contact book, I cant even find anyone to talk with.
I can only express my feelings via sms to sotong, darling, ah ma, and CF.
These 3 girls 1 boy actually listen a lot of my complains and ranting these days.
I know I am like a nuisance to people but…. I just want to get someone to talk to me.
You ask me where is ah S*** ?
err (my opinion) I think we grow a distance due to something.
As you all know I have a lot of guy friends, if I start complaining to them,
For sure they all will be irritated by me….
Sometimes I don’t dare to sms CF, I scare he will find me annoying.
Sometimes I don’t dare to sms ah ma, I scare I will disturb her study(she always got exam).

Recently have been calling mr.J-SC, I take him as a buddy to talk to..
But he seems to be so busy and I always call at the wrong timing.
Everytime I call him he is either sleeping or working =l
He never calls me anymore I think I should stop calling him.
Maybe he find me annoying le.
Ah ma is too young to understand all these, so sms her enough,
Wa sms ah ma I will get very angry at times >:(
Ah ma if you are reading I bet you know why hor. ;D
Always reply me soooooooooooooo late. But now ok la, not so late le.

Sian. Talking about this friendship. Seriously I am tired of backstabbing.
This foreign friend of mine… I am seriously very fed up with.
1st she asked my darling to team with her to do assignment without informing me.
2nd she created a lot of lies and framing me to my darling.
3rd that day we fought, she wrote me a letter expressing her feelings.

On the day hor, I was fighting with my friend on the phone since morning,
My face is super obvious I am in bad mood. My phone keep ringing. I have been answering calls.
After the fighting issue, I had some gossip session with the girls.
So she thinks that I am talking bad and ranting all about her.
Well I did in the beginning, I admit, I jokingly say wa she steal my darling away.
When class almost ending, she wrote me a letter.
I got fucking pissed with the letter and I actually reply back though I find it super childish.
She attitude me, she say she can choose not to do the course work anymore if I am behaving like this again. And she says she knows I’ve complained to everyone.

I remember I replied the letter that I am not a person who will explain a lot as I do not tolerate this kind of bullshyt thing. First of all I am not angry because of her, and it was because I have family problems.
After we went to auditorium, she TOOK my seat although I actually shouted out loud I WAN TO SIT INSIDE.
Well, in the end I sat outside emo-ing and non of them dare to talk to me.(maybe they overheard I shouted to the phone when my fren called and fought with him)
I remember calling “responsible” and rant on him, he is like blue blur dunno what am I talking about.
Lmao.

Basically she told my darling whenever me and her go out, she pays for everything.
Bull shyt. Since when she pay for everything?
I only went out with her alone once and it is together with ah seng, we pay for ourselves.
She told my darling I am greedy.
She say that time the photostate issue.
She offered rm30 to let me earn and asked me to photostate for her.
That time I do not have change for RM50 and I don’t want to take this type of money.
so I told her the Photostatting is not very expensive until the extend of rm30
she say never mind, she let me earn but I refused to take.
I told her is it ok if I take the RM50 and help you photostate then I return you next week?
Suddenly she went off in the middle of the class to photostate =.=
So she told my darling that she gives me 30 I donwan but I want rm50 .
WA WTF. Luckily I have 2 witnesses with me that time when it happens.
She claims that I am her first friend in the college and she treats me like xiao mei mei.
I was like wtf, I wasn’t even her first friend please.
On the day we fought, she actually bought me breakfast, I did not ask her to buy ok.
She told my darling that she bought breakfast just for me, she didn’t even buy herself =.=
HELLO, she should know that I stay with family sure got breakfast everyday what =.=

A lot more la but I choose to ignore now.


Talk in terms of VIRTUAL/ONLINE FRIEND
FUCK IT!

You are fucking pathetic you idiotic bimbo “almighty” whom you think you are.
Is just a fucking ex stead of you and you have to make it like as if is a big thing.
And giving me so much trouble in HS life. Not like I am his RL gf.
We are just trying to have fun playing this game you see, but you take it so seriously.
You got problem with him, you fight with him, you gl with him but In the end I tio for everything.
You gave me a “death sentence” without informing me and explaining.
Is like, you walk on the street, slap a woman and leave. =.=
You even called me a hooker. Wow. Such a “good friend”
You got problem with him, go find him. You don’t have to suan us, we are doing fine.
Seriously, I know your intention is to get rid of me from HS,
Trust me, one day you will succeed :) as now I am fking fed up already.
I thought you were mature in thinking, but now I guess not.


I am not going to rant anymore.
I am shame of myself now for ranting all these in irrational thinking and talking.
Sian, I promise to myself not to use the word FUCK anymore but this post…..
Ahhhh exception. I am a very good girl who don’t vulgar in rl :D *cough*


P.s: Anyone has any idea how to lock certain post on blog? Like you have to input password?


I have to go off now because someone is barking now.
When I really want to do assignment then she barks like hell.
Fking hell. I fking like my life. Life sucks. Sucks really bad.
Fking piece of shyt. Now she scolding me for some fucking house chore things zzzzzzzzzzz

Labels: complain complain complain